One sure thing

There are few things we can count on in life other than change. It can happen in an instant or it can happen over a few weeks or months but for sure it happens. Sometimes change happens so slowly you hardly even notice it until, one day you see things completely different. It is in that moment you realize, for better or worse, you have changed. Then there are the times you make change happen, a choice, a conscious effort to recreate or relocate or do something totally out of your comfort zone. Switch things up to make your own life better.

Bring in the surprise factor and change can send you reeling….the sudden loss of someone close, the betrayal of a friend you trusted for years. Forced change is by far one of the hardest changes, at least for me, to deal with. I don’t allow many people to get too close into my heart for this very reason but when I do, you’re “all in”. Break that trust or betray me and you’re done. It may sound pretty harsh and severe, but I can cut you out of my life, with the skill of a highly trained surgeon. Every possible tie is broken and absolutely NO information that I have any control over is given about me. The person doesn’t get to know where I am, what I’m doing, who I talk to etc. I leave them with the wondering, the not knowing and their thoughts or reminders of me. As far as I’m concerned they have no rights to know a single thing about me once they have hurt and betrayed me. It all changes.

This brings me to how we change ourselves. It’s a sure thing; we change. Whether its chosen or not, everyday we meet with the challenge of how to adjust to it. How we might want to make it happen or how we plan to alter its path, our path. Looking for the good or just pieces of positive parts so that we may become the better for it. Taking the lessons learned and applying the better parts to make us better people. A person who can hold their head up and say ” I met with a dragon today – it scared the crap out of me but I learned from it “.

Change is unstoppable, for me the key is how you deal with it and the choices you make. I happen to be one of those people who needs time to think, to examine the parts and the rolls all have played. I take the time to digest the hurt and the pain that have changed my life. Slowly I adjust to the changes others have inflicted and I move on, I push forward and make the alterations necessary to stay true to myself. Bitterness is not an emotion I like to feel or carry so I refuse to let that in. My choice has always been to learn from change, accept it and use it to be the person I want to be. Someone who is open, honest, loving, giving and taken their share of changes with grace.

It’s a sure thing change comes – how you handle it is completely up to you.

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3 Responses to One sure thing

  1. clinock says:

    It’s lovely to see you back, you were missed. Your words touch deeply in my heart at this moment in time. You are so right, of course, change is the only constant and we all know it. Sometimes it’s welcome, sometimes it brings unbearable hurt. We can learn through the pain and move on but these simple words make this seem easy and it never is easy. Loss of those close to us in our life, be it through death or the breaking of trust can be hell. We can respond by closing and carrying bitterness as a weight on our shoulders and soul or we can reach for the light. I hope the light finds you my friend…

    • John, Thanks so much for the lovely comment.
      I haven’t been able to write for so long and it felt good to get some thoughts in order. Life just seems so crazy sometimes and I usually find peace and solace here with you and my blog family but this latest transition has been difficult to digest.
      Having said that; I am well and plans are in the making for my second trip to see my family in Melfi Italy next June. Moving forward seems to put the past behind me quicker.
      I always focus on the light, sometimes it’s covered by a few clouds but I still know it’s there.

  2. greenlakeblue says:

    I can almost make my words yours. I so much understand your message here. I am currently in a process of shifting my consciousness into a pain-free dimension. I am grateful for the pain, now I change and move on. Change occurs when we detach ourselves from past sorrows. Sometimes others have to go through a process of change too, but only if they realised it.
    There is impermanence in everything.

    Let’s be strong and put grace back in our journey.
    I wish you all the best 🙂


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